The internet is a door, and with advances in cell phone technology over the past 15 years, we now have all the buttons to that door in our hands at all hours of the day. But the problem with this door is that it is an ever-evolving mystery. You are addicted to opening that door even though you never know what will happen on the other side. Sometimes it’s a highlight of a team you don’t even follow, other times it’s a video of a dog and a turtle becoming friends, and then sometimes there’s this guy who bought Hugh Hefner’s viagra bottle boasting he had “over nine” Martin Luther King, Jr. documents ON Martin Luther King, Jr. Day.
Much like my qualms with how many airships exist in the world today (somewhere between 15 and 25, no one knows for sure), NINE just isn’t a big enough number to stop the count. Especially when it comes to something as important, in his own words, as the historical artifacts of one of the most upright Americans of all time. It’s not “here’s a picture of my dad walking arm in arm next to MLK”. It’s, literally, “I bought it from the prison warden’s family and no one else can touch it.” You know the villains in this story? They always profit in one way or another. Thanks Darren!
The stunned silence of this Twitter space really tells the whole story. The “I’m SORRY I’m white” immediately met with an extremely pissed off “Okay” is almost as funny as talking about owning a signed Rosa Parks rookie card. This shit is not about race, please stop yelling at everyone. It’s about pretending to be a student and a fan of history while simultaneously refusing to part with such records because of their monetary value. If he really cared about historical significance, he wouldn’t hesitate to send him to a museum, any museum, so that future generations could get a glimpse of such an important figure in history. of our country. I think that’s what’s counterintuitive here, not people calling you an asshole for being an asshole. I also think I won’t be able to sleep a wink tonight until I find out what else he has in this British museum of a house he built. “See that shovel? This is the shovel they dug the Underground Railroad with.
Everything I’ve learned about Darren Rovell has been against my will, and that doesn’t seem to be changing any time soon. He will never log out, he will never do what a real living human would do in whatever scenario he finds himself in, he will burn all the historical artifacts he owns when he dies and wipe out an era of the human history similar to the flames of the Great Library of Alexandria. And we just can’t do anything to stop it.